Wednesday, June 15, 2016

30 Before 30 - A Revisit of Sorts

It's been almost a year since I compiled this list and thought it would be a tad bit motivating to revisit it and give some updates. So...here goes.

  1. Learn to play guitar - it's ridiculous that I have the music background that I have and have never learned.  Update: Learned 2 chords? That counts right? We'll call this one "in progress"
  2. Take a spontaneous trip - no plans, to itineraries.
  3. Do one thing that absoultely terrifies me - vague, but necessary.
  4. Present at a conference - yay professional development!
  5. Run a 10K - we'll probably start with a 5K here
  6. Buy a House 
  7. Learn to meditate - I've heard good things. Figured I would give it a shot.
  8. Blog More - Check! (Doing that RIGHT NOW)
  9. Write a book  Update Halfway there. May turn it into a blog instead?
  10. Buy a house
  11. Skydive/bungee jump
  12. Manage debt - Going into my 30's debt free, ya'll Calling this one "in progress" too.
  13. Set up emergency savings fund - yay more adult things!
  14. Meet an elephant
  15. Habitat For Humanity build
  16. Start a garden - might have to wait for #6
  17. Hike in NC - Really. I've lived here 3 years already. Check! Completed a three mile hike up in Troutman buuttt there's lots more places I want to try.
  18. Go to the movies by myself - honestly never done this. I'm terrified of it. CHECK! Super proud of this one. Went to see Jungle Book one random Friday I had off and it was awesome - the movie and the experience.
  19. Go camping 
  20. Take a cooking class
  21. Unplug from my phone for a whole weekend - <cries uncontrollably the whole time>
  22. Snorkeling/Scuba diving
  23. Swim in a waterfall
  24. Get a tattoo - directly related to #14
  25. Get something published
  26. Embrace Vegetables - <shudder> Check! I actually like cooked broccoli. Who knew?!
  27. Bristol Rhythm and Roots Reunion - a three day, boot stompin', real country music festival in Bristol Tennessee/Virginia. Check! Easily one of the best music festivals I've ever been to.
  28. Watch Star Wars start to finish - True Life: I have never seen any of them. Check! I watched all of them in a week to prepare for Episode 7. Can't say I hated it.
  29. Put a secret in a PostSecret book in a bookstore - I found one in my book a few years ago. Time to return the favor.
  30. Visit 2 more states - may just get in the car and drive for this one. Update: Iowa in August and then...? Hopefully traveling somewhere fun next year :D
6 Down...a bunch in progress and a year and a half to go. Stay Tuned!

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

30 Before 30

I was talking to a friend the other day who is turning 30 in a few months. I've never really latched onto ages, or been defined by the way I'm supposed to behave or certain goals I'm supposed to accomplish because I'm a "certain age." But she was stressing because she felt like she had done SO much in her 20s but really wanted to roll (run?) into her 30s knowing she had done everything she wanted. No regrets. And it got me thinking about how I could really maximize these last few years of my 20s.

Everyone needs a little motivation to learn new things, be a better person, or check some things off a bucket list. And what better motivator than time? I'll be 30 in roughly two in a half years and now seemed like a more than reasonable time to start working on my 30 before 30 list. I have no idea if it's even possible to do all of this in less than 3 years. I mean, things could seriously come up out of no where. However, checking off a few of these seems like a step in the right direction to say farewell to my 20s and embrace my 30s with open arms.

So without further ado, the list:


  1. Learn to play guitar - it's ridiculous that I have the music background that I have and have never learned. 
  2. Take a spontaneous trip - no plans, to itineraries.
  3. Do one thing that absoultely terrifies me - vague, but necessary.
  4. Present at a conference - yay professional development!
  5. Run a 10K - we'll probably start with a 5K here
  6. Buy a House 
  7. Learn to meditate - I've heard good things. Figured I would give it a shot.
  8. Blog More - Check! (Doing that RIGHT NOW)
  9. Write a book 
  10. Buy a gun
  11. Skydive/bungee jump
  12. Manage debt - Going into my 30's debt free, ya'll
  13. Set up emergency savings fund - yay more adult things!
  14. Meet an elephant
  15. Habitat For Humanity build
  16. Start a garden - might have to wait for #6
  17. Hike in NC - Really. I've lived here 3 years already.
  18. Go to the movies by myself - honestly never done this. I'm terrified of it.
  19. Go camping 
  20. Take a cooking class
  21. Unplug from my phone for a whole weekend - <cries uncontrollably the whole time>
  22. Snorkeling/Scuba diving
  23. Swim in a waterfall
  24. Get a tattoo - directly related to #14
  25. Get something published
  26. Embrace Vegetables - <shudder>
  27. Bristol Rhythm and Roots Reunion - a three day, boot stompin', real country music festival in Bristol Tennessee/Virginia.
  28. Watch Star Wars start to finish - True Life: I have never seen any of them
  29. Put a secret in a PostSecret book in a bookstore - I found one in my book a few years ago. Time to return the favor.
  30. Visit 2 more states - may just get in the car and drive for this one.
Random? Yes. Doable? Probably. Excited? Ridiculously. I'm not terrified of my 30s. In fact, I've honestly only heard good things thus far from those that are a little head of the game. But I will, without a doubt, be sending my 20s out with a bang.

Fingers Crossed (and crossing off #8) - hoping to keep track of some of the adventures here. Wish me luck!


Thursday, September 4, 2014

Game Day Decision

I get a significant amount of crap for my choice in professional sports teams.  Constantly defending my decisions to like one team over the other as well my decision to cheer for the home team when I go to a game that I have no personal stake in. My Big 4, football, baseball, basketball, hockey, are all in different cities.  To break it down:

Football: I’m an Eagles fan but cheer for the Panthers 364 days a year. This year being the only time I’ve had to pick between the two since I moved here.
Baseball: I cheer for the O’s but appreciate the fact that the Nats weren’t around during my childhood and now they are at the same time supporting the Charlotte Knights that feed into the White Sox network.
Basketball: Though I’ve never been deeply invested in the sport I found myself watching and cheering for the Bobcats (Hornets) when I moved here but follow the Warriors more on social media and can probably name more of their players do to a random six-degrees connection to one of their players.
Hockey: Washington is technically my home team and I’m happy to say out of the four, that’s the only one that’s really uncontested.

I would like to pretend it’s strictly a professional sports, but I’ve been exposed to quite a few different college sporting events since moving here, too. On the shelf next to my 6 years worth of free I Bleed Purple t-shirts are shirts from Davidson College, NC State, Carolina, Virginia and I’m almost sad to admit it, but in about two weeks I’ll own a yellow Appalachian State shirt for a game I begrudgingly agreed to go in a month.

Mixed up? Maybe. And it should also come as no shock that I regularly have to defend my choices as well explain the collection of sports apparel that covers professional and college teams all up and down the East Coast and one basketball team in San Francisco. My favorite is trying to convince someone that I have a valid reason to be passionate about a team from a city I’ve never lived in and have no logical connection to. A close second favorite is explaining why I live in Charlotte, own 6 Panther’s t-shirts and hats and will still cheer for the Eagles on November 10th this year.

At the end of the day and to explain it in its most simplified form, I just love sports. I love having something to cheer for, to be passionate about, and to be a part of a community that comes together for a common reason. It’s refreshing to see 60,000 people all wearing the same color, cheering for the same thing amongst the conflict that plagues everyday life.  And if that means that every Sunday I put on black and blue to tailgate in uptown Charlotte while checking the Eagles score on my phone to be a part of that particular community, then so be it. (I also refuse to be one of those people who shows up to a game wearing a jersey from a team that isn’t even playing on the same coast.)

I will continue to explain my reasoning as it will continue to come up but I only see my collection of various athletic team apparel increasing as I continue to hang out with people that love sports and their teams as much as I love mine. Though not without a fight, I have accepted that I will be sitting alone on November 10th in black and teal watching the Eagles take on the Panthers in Philly. And on Tuesday I will more than likely be the victim of excessive mocking or the most hated depending on the outcome of the game. Though I’m loyal to my teams, defending my decisions to cheer on the home team no matter who they are is worth it to have something to cheer for every season. 

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Confessions of an Extrovert

My sophomore year of college and again during my first semester of grad school, I was given the opportunity to take the Myers-Briggs personality test. I say "opportunity" because it's not something you can just find online and it's usually part of some team building activity in offices and HR interventions. Without going into too much detail, you answer a bunch of behavioral questions, it gives you four letters which are called your "personality"type, and then you read an accompanying page of info about the type that has some insight into your personality traits. Both times I took it, it has been spot on. But surprisingly enough, I changed in between the two tests. One thing that didn't change was that I was off the charts, as high as I could possibly be, an extrovert.

Contrary to social norms, extrovert doesn't necessarily mean I'm extremely outgoing (though that's true) and introvert doesn't mean you hide in a corner at parties (though that is sometimes also true). Nor are the words "extrovert" and "social" interchangeable. It just means I get my energy from being around other people whereas introverts get their energy from internal sources. I would rather go to a party and be constantly surrounding by others, introverts tend to have to work up to that point. The first time I took the test, my team of 15 was pretty split down the middle on who identified with each of these traits. The second time I took the test, the three people I worked closely with all identified as introverts. Did we get along? Absolutely. We just had different ways of handling situations and social settings.

There's a lot of things I LOVE about being an extrovert but often I'm questioned about why I do certain things and often I'm asked something along the lines of "what part about that is fun?" I don't feel like I need to justify my need for excessive use of social media or my need to be near other living, breathing, talking humans at all times but more like explain some of my favorite qualities that have the ability to drive some people nuts.

Things About My Personality That Are Directly Related To My Off-The-Charts Extrovert Reading

  1. I will do what it takes to be around people. I have been known to neglect other "non-important" things if it means I'm hanging out with people I like. Some of these things may include: sleeping, eating, cleaning, gas, laundry, dishes, budgets, and anything else that can wait another day or be readjusted to fit an activity.
  2. I will get upset if I miss a social event. I've driven over night, spent money I don't have, taken time off of work and crashed on friends' couches to make sure I'm there when something is going on. If for whatever reason, I can't be there, I cut my losses and hope whatever I've decided to do instead is equally as fun and that I take much better pictures than I would have at the other event.
  3. I will make small talk with strangers. I can and will find something to talk to anyone about. And in all honesty, some of those conversations turn out to be some of my best stories.
  4. I will check my phone every five minutes. It makes all my friends and most of my coworkers just thrilled to hang out or go to lunch with me. I know half of this is related to my Generation-Y characteristics and the fact that information is readily available, but I'm also blaming the fact that I have this subconscious need to be connected to everyone all the time.
  5. I will Instagram, Tweet, and Facebook anything that's worthy of the thumb movement. The people in my life need to know what I'm doing it. That means using social media to its full potential.
  6. I will always be a people pleaser. I'm at my best when I'm around people and I'm even better when all of those people are getting along and having a good time. To do that, I go out of my way to make everyone happy, even when they're not in my immediate calendar. Need a ride somewhere? I'm not busy. Want me to do a freelance project pro-bono? Sure! I could use the experience. Want me to get there an hour early and get everything set up? Yeah, no problem. I only need 4 hours of sleep, anyways. 
  7. I will take time out of my day to have a conversation with a coworker. I will also add that I won't work at a job where I am completely autonomous and will take a walk to talk to someone rather than send an email. Not only do I personally enjoy it, but it makes the day go faster and builds relationships. Yay networking!
  8. I will make phone calls on long road trips. Trips in the car are WAY too much time to myself. My head wanders, my thoughts go crazy, and a well-sculpted playlist is only good for about 2 hours. I will make phone calls and am grateful that my sister and a few random friends can usually be counted on for entertainment. Texting a driving is illegal, kids. Don't use that as a form of distraction while driving.
  9. I will never know the meaning of excessive alone time. This is only half true. I do enjoy the occasional hour by myself but during that time, I'm well connected via my phone, TV and lap top. Rarely do I shut the world out and spend time with literally just myself...and my cute dog.
  10. I will take my relationships very seriously. My relationships mean the world to me and sometimes, a little sacrifice on my end (if it means avoiding a fight or saving us both from a heated conversation) is well worth it. While this directly relates to the "people pleaser" thing, I do go out of my way to make sure my relationships are safe and for the most part, healthy. It takes me a lot less work emotionally to forgive and forget than it does for me to hold a grudge and drag something out. It takes a lot for me to actually phase someone out but catch me on a bad day and I'll probably just not talk to you for a while.
I know there's a lot of other elements to the Myers-Briggs personality types but in that 4 year gap of taking it two different times, my extrovert score didn't change. I was equally as extroverted as a First Year Graduate Assistant as I was as a Sophomore RA in Eagle Hall. When you take the test, you get matched up with a celebrity and my well-known person with a similar personality was...wait for it...Snoopy! That should come as no surprise to anyone who has been in my apartment or knows about my (not in the foreseeable) future tattoo plans. Snoopy and I have the same personality type and while I always loved him, this little revelation just sealed the deal.

To be honest, I'm not hiding behind the test to explain my social behavior nor am I completely discrediting the validity of being defined by a certain set of characteristics. But recently, since my life has belonged to everyone but me and I continue to move forward at a blistering speed, I felt it necessary to blame my extroverted-ness for something. I do embody almost all of the traits my one-page description outlined for me and while it just confirmed some things I already knew, it did give me some insight into how I deal with situations, conflicts and other people. If nothing else, it's an external look at how to maybe improve. For now, I'll just continue running around from event to event, planning activities with other people, and documenting it all on social media. 


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If you'd like to learn more about Myers-Briggs, you can click here. If you have never taken the test, I highly recommend you do if ever given the chance. If nothing else, you can learn what kinds of people to avoid.

Monday, June 10, 2013

A Good Place To Live

I don't know what I expected when I planned a weekend in Bristol but whatever those expectations were, they were more than met and it's a weekend I would repeat 10 times. It was definitely different than my typical "get crazy" weekend in Charlotte but I loved every minute of it.

I've known Jenna for 8 months if you don't count the 7 years I "knew" her when we were at JMU. Since we reunited, I've been talking about going to Bristol to watch her race. For about 8 years she's been driving every make and model of race car in this grass roots (as her dad put it) racing league. A lot of her races are near her home but she's traveled all over the place to race. To top it off, she works for NASCAR, is completely submerged in the auto racing industry and is constantly pointing out my lack of knowledge of the culture.

So Megan and I finally committed and made plans to go to Bristol for the weekend. We got up early Saturday to make the 3-hour trip stopping every hour for the bathroom and being utterly floored by our first stop. The bathroom had a sign in it that said "Please don't flush paper down the toilet." (Just let that sink in for a minute). Then we're pretty sure the two guys at the counter stole the debit card they were using, and the guy at the coffee counter walked out on his cup of decaf when the attendant told him she didn't have any sugar packets. (Really!? Not sure if I'm more shocked that he needs sugar that much or that the store didn't have any in stock). Meanwhile, in the parking lot, a woman had driven her tractor to the station to get gas. Seeing as there wasn't a house within a mile of the gas station, we're pretty sure she was going to have to use all of the gas she'd just bought to get home.

About halfway through our trip, Jenna texts us to ask what our plans are. Uhm, call us crazy but weren't we going to see her? Shouldn't she have a plan for us? She was headed to the track already and gave us a list of restaurants to try in downtown Bristol and told us to kill some time. So we embarked on a self-guided tour of Bristol complete with antiquing and a trip to the giant sign. For those who don't know, Bristol is on the state line between Tennessee and Virginia. On one side of the street, you're in Bristol, Tennessee and on the other side, you're in Bristol, Virginia. We got a kick out of being in two places at once and joining in on the town joke that the sign says it's a good (not great) place to live.

 Doing a little antiquing on the VA side!

A quick trip to Wal-Mart proved to be an adventure in itself. The shelves were lined with NASCAR gear and Duck Dynasty paraphernalia and we made out with some funky shirts and duct tape to make shirts for Jenna's race. We eventually made it to her house where we met up with her mom. At this point, we'd been in Bristol for 4 hours, toured downtown, gone to Wal-Mart, met her mom, saw her childhood bedroom and still hadn't actually seen Jenna. She called to check-in and make sure we got there okay and said she'd see us at the race.

We hopped in the car to make the hour-long trek to the race track. The way Jenna talks about her mom, I feel like I've known her forever. It turns out Jenna tells her mom and us all the same things so we were able to bond over those stories on the trip. As we drove through, her mom told us stories about how they used to live at the track and how one adventure to a drive-in took an unexpected turn. It was an easy conversation which helped considering there were only miles and miles of trees and mountains to look at (not complaining, it was gorgeous).

We made it to the track watched Jenna qualify and she came up to say hi (first Jenna sighting since we arrived). Much like minor league baseball, grass roots racing has a lot of bells and whistles that accompany the races: introductions, talking to the racers, and a few games to make it a little interesting. We watched a few of the other classes of race cars and Jenna completed her first race.


The track :)

As the sun started going down, things started getting interesting. I grew up close to the country so I'm not unfamiliar with country folk. Southwest Virginians, however, need their own introduction. Jenna has somewhat of a southern accent but I was more or less floored by some of the accents during the interviews they conducted. There were families and firends sitting in groups cheering for certain drivers and getting feisty during cautions and accidents. At one point, I thought there was going to be an all out family vs. family brawl after one driver spun out another. There was a mom cheering on her son so vigorously that she had to take puffs off of her inhaler in between laps just to keep it up and one driver had cut off his racing suit and his black and red heart boxers were showing out of the bottom. At the end of the night, we sliced up a watermelon right in the infield and had a little "treat" as they put it.

We headed back to the house where Jenna's mom laid out a full-blown spread of meats, cheeses, chicken salad, pasta salad and chips that would have been fit for any family BBQ. Jenna showed up about an hour later and we were able to hang out before we ALL passed out after the excitement from the day. They took us to lunch Sunday where I was blessed with soft pretzels and a beer cheese dip that is worth the trip back in itself.

I feel like you learn a lot about someone when you visit their hometown and while I knew a lot about Jenna going into it, nothing could have prepared me for the excitement at the track. The contrast between Jenna and her relaxed parents and the families coming out in broods of 10+ was startling. They take this racing very seriously and had there been no cars actually driving around the track, it would have been equally as entertaining. I'm sure they would come to my hometown and judge every thing about it so I don't feel the least bit guilty pointing this out. Different strokes for different folks and all.

I'm not a newcomer to auto racing having seen a ton of races in Richmond growing up but I recently rekindled my love for the sport when NASCAR was here in Charlotte a few weeks ago. I don't know where Saturday night short track racing has been all my life but it will definitely be a permanent fixture from here on out. I already made plans with my dad to go to Winston-Salem and he's taking me to Richmond on my next trip home.

 The Bristol sign lit up at night :)

If nothing else, I had a relaxing, entertaining, and enlightening weekend. I got to hang out with some pretty awesome people and witness Jenna in her natural habitat. Should we make another trip to Bristol (and we will), I challenge it to be half as exciting as it was this time. Who knows, maybe I'll learn what it really means to be an "Appalachian American."


Thursday, May 16, 2013

Middle Child Syndrome

It's a real thing.

My "diagnosis" with the "disease" has always been more of a joke. I'm the middle of three girls: 7 years younger than my older sister and 18 months older than the baby. We had a jokes growing up about it; random "pick on Christy" marathons where they ganged up on me and pointed out every little thing I said. We're all a lot alike but also very different so we all found our own hobbies, our own niches, and our own groove. It wasn't until a recent conversation with a friend about my so called "disease" that I decided to look into it a little more.

So, being the researcher that I am, I googled it. And came across an entire community of research, blogs, family planners and message boards, all about middle child syndrome. So yes, it is a real thing, and yes, I do have it. And yes, this discovery has been the highlight of my week. I know things like this (horoscopes, abstract concepts, etc.) tend to be vague so people can draw their own conclusions about their own lives. And naturally, I found research that I agreed with and some I didn't.

Seeing as this is a happy discovery, I'm gonna focus on the positive first. I learned in this research that middle children learn early on to speak up and stand out to get the attention they're often denied. They tend to be more flexible and aren't often thrown off when things don't go their way. They thrive in spontaneous situations and find planning and organizing somewhat of a burden. They build strong relationships and hold them closely. They have a hard time making decisions and when they do, the decisions are usually rash and not well thought out. But when they do make these bad decisions, they are great at the aftermath and can usually handle it quickly and painlessly. I think it's safe to say that I exhibit most if not all of these behaviors.

There's definitely some negative connotations to this syndrome and probably explains why we all get such a bad name. A lot of research says we're co-dependent and have low-self esteem because we didn't get a lot of attention growing up. It also says middle children are constantly seeking their parents approval and looking for attention whether that be in a negative or positive way. This low-self esteem and feeling of inadequacy can often keep them from pursuing what they want. Clearly, none of these things apply to me. However, if I have an identity crisis at some point in my life (which happens often) we know it's a direct result of my being the second child.

One of the bigger pieces and something I saw frequently was that middle children are often defined by their older sibling and overshadowed by the younger sibling. The older sibling gets to do everything first. And the younger sibling is, well, the baby. And while I spent a lot of my childhood as "Betsy's sister" I don't ever feel like I was forced to be defined by her. In fact, I wanted to be just like her. And there's some things about her I still wish I could steal. On the other end, my little sister and me are so close in age that we shared almost everything. We got phones at the same time, had the same rules and curfews, sometimes even had matching outfits, and now we share a pretty diverse circle of friends.

I made a joke the other day about how I've embraced my middle child syndrome, but I'm starting to believe that holds a little more truth that I initially intended. Some of the middle child qualities I identify with have landed me in a new state with new friends and a plethora of new experiences that make me step outside my box. My older sister got to have the first kid and my little sister is having a big, fancy wedding, so there's no pressure on me for grandchildren or to settle down too quick. I get to make mistakes, learn from them, and move on because I've had so much experience making similar mistakes when I was growing up and no one is really paying attention to me (sidenote: this is joke. My parents love us all equally). I'm not saying that I'm stomping on the floor throwing a tantrum because no one is paying attention to me, but I do recognize that I'm a little different than the two of them and have quite a few qualities that make me question how the three of us ever survived 18 years in the same house.

Don't get me wrong, I love being in the middle. I get to be both a big sister and a little sister at the same time. I get to learn from my older sister's mistakes and try not to make mistakes that affect the younger one. I honestly don't think my parents "ignored" me and I don't think they played favorites, (like so many middle children claim) but I am grateful that I had a little room to stretch my wings and no one has faulted me for the quirky, creative, sometimes reckless behavior that I exhibit everyday. Whether that behavior is a direct result of me identifying as a middle child or not, it's safe to say that being stuck in the middle has had some kind of impact on my personality. And if I have to live in the shadow of an older sibling and fight for attention with the other, I couldn't think of two other people who know exactly how and when to put me in my place: right smack dab in the middle. Afterall, isn't the middle section the best part of an oreo?

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Three Sixty Five

I'll admit, I was going to save this post for the one year anniversary of my move to Charlotte but I thought the month between graduation and that move deserved some of the credit. Plus, all the hype and Facebook-focus on everyone graduating at JMU this weekend and it just felt timely. May 4th (Saturday) was the one year anniversary of the day I graduated and it has been a whirlwind of a time since then. Three hundred sixty five days later and I'm concerned how the next year is ever going to top this past one.

In the past year, I traveled to Europe and traipsed across Ireland and London for two weeks. I said good-bye to six years of experiences in Harrisonburg and moved to Charlotte. I started a job at a fortune 50 company doing something I have NEVER done before. I've been to concerts, sporting events, weekend-long adventures, and added to my ever-expanding friend network. And three of my best friends and one sister got engaged and a handful of others got married. It's been nothing short of a roller coaster to say the least.

While there's been a lot of ups, there's been a handful of downs. I'm making more money than I ever have before but my lifestyle changed accordingly so I'm not living large like I planned. Some of my most valued relationships have been tested. And after a year of doing a job that I love, I still have no idea where I want to be 5 years from now. Regardless of these little hiccups, I don't pretend to be the same person I was a year ago and have both the good and the bad to thank for it.

The pros definitely outweigh the cons and I have zero regrets about this past year. I'm so looking forward to the next 365 days. There's quite a few weddings, a boat, and some trips I'm looking forward to and oh-so-many things in Charlotte I have yet to try. Past that, I'm not sure what to expect. But then again, I wasn't really quite sure what to expect when I moved down here to begin with.

I know I'm ready for a new adventure and I'm ready to test a few theories. I'm ready to capitalize on the opportunities I've been putting on hold and I'm more than ready to move forward...whatever that may mean or take to happen. So, here's to another successful and challenging 365 days of awesome people, awesome experiences in the awesome city I've come to love.